Are you satisfied with your sexual life?
Sex counseling will help you want to enhance the vitality of your sexual experiences. Your sexuality can be a source of joy and comfort it once used to be. Do your sexual experiences enhance your relationship and deepen your intimate emotional connections? Who does not want a truly healthy sexuality?
Sex Therapy requires both great courage and a safe environment.
We are sexual creatures from birth until death. You cannot separate your identity from your sexuality. You do not have a “sex-life” separate from the rest of your life. You are your sex life – for better or worse. There is no mental illness that does not have a sexual component to it. Sexual issues will evoke our most primitive vulnerabilities because there is no part of us that is more basic, more primitive, or more important to the formation of our sense of self. Sexual dysfunction is often the primary cause of emotional dysfunction generally and is present at some level in every mental illness.
Most people have been told that these are private matters not to be discussed outside the family. Usually, that actually meant not being discussed at all. However, since no therapy can avoid the topic of your sexuality, we are going to have to address it with honesty at some point. Sexual intimacy issues require care and patience for both the therapist and the patient.
I will work diligently to ensure that these sensitive issues are dealt with compassionately and with a “benevolent curiosity.” You set the stage and control the depth of our work. I trust that your mind, whether you are conscious of it or not, knows what the problems are and what the solutions might be. Freud was correct when he said, “It isn’t about not knowing, it’s about not wanting to know.” There is no subject in therapy more directly subject to repression and defenses like denial than issues around sexuality. It makes us very vulnerable and, therefore, we must go cautiously. If you are experiencing any form of sexual dysfunction or if you simply are not satisfied with your sex life, than sex therapy counseling can help.
Every couple faces challenges in achieving a lasting and satisfying erotic life.
Are you experiencing any type of sexual disorder or dysfunction? Are you inhibited in your sexual performance? It is common to the point of universal that people, at one time or another, struggle with issues of desire and performance, whether they are in a new relationship or in one that has lasted for decades. Sex counseling for couples is a great way to work through those issues together in an atmosphere of trust.
The good news is that for over 100 years psychoanalytic therapy has been the best method for getting at the fundamental issues that prevent you from achieving the type of physical intimacy you desire and deserve.
In order to achieve what you want, we will need to explore your whole development from the beginning. Sexuality grows with identity and cannot be separated from it. Sexuality does not begin in adolescence with the obvious changes in bodily shape and function, but rather is laid down by parents in the overall emotional atmosphere of the home. Parents who themselves do not have a satisfying sexuality cannot provide the basics of a healthy sexuality for their children. It is not what you teach your children; it is the example you set for them emotionally that determines their own approach to sexuality.
Our sexuality is a function of how we were raised, but it is not some biologically rigid absolute. The good news is that we can change and do things differently. I have been working for well over 15 years with patients who come to me ready to make those changes. Sexual dysfunction therapy can make things better for both of you.
Perhaps the best way to begin sexual counseling is for you and your partner to watch a few of my videos on this web site. Obviously, the one entitled, The Sexual Relationship would be a good place to start, but the infant and child development videos would also set the stage. The videos titled, Fusion and Merger are a great, brief review of loving adult relationships and what happens to derail both the intimacy and the sexuality a couple experiences. Getting comfortable with the best research on the subject is an excellent way to normalize your issues so that we can safely and effectively approach sexuality in a matter-of-fact way that minimizes the residues of shame and guilt.
In the end, there is no substitute for just picking up the phone and making the call to set an initial appointment. If sexuality is an issue for you and your partner, psycho-sexual therapy may be the answer you have been looking for. I am here to help you make the changes that will make your healthy fantasies into reality.